Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
