so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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