Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
