Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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