Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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