Grow some girl-balls and come out already
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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