i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
