The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
