I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
