Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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