My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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