I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize