Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
This girl is more easily done than said...
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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