What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
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