I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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