He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
