Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
