508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
