So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
