Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
