White coat. Heels.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize