I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
