I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I understand Curling. That high.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
