just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
