Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize