"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
That accounts for only three of the penises
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
