hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
