no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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