We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize
