drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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