Small penises have feelings too.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize