He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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