Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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