Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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