This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
