Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
