youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
