my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
