I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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