So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
