i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
