porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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