i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
