where does the pee come out of this thing
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
