id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
