you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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