And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I looked at my own cervix.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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