Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Those nachos came to me in a dream
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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