pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize