Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
